When you have a baby, no one can seem to resist the urge to kiss your newborn and soak up that amazing newborn smell. That’s understandable, truly. Let’s state the obvious.
“Babies are really cute and have little chunky cheeks and look very kissable,” says Gina Posner, MD, a board-certified pediatrician at MemorialCare Medical Group.
And yet, one viral TikTok warns that kissing other people's newborn babies can be a dangerous and potentially life-threatening choice,
One commenter on the video wrote that the advice should be “common sense.” But as a two-time pandemic mother who took longer than some would’ve liked to get back to normal, I can tell you that it is not.
Enter “Nurse LuLu,” a labor and delivery registered nurse who posts as @nurse__lauren on TikTok. She recently took to the app to talk about the potential harms of baby-kissing with a little humor and empathy.
"Please don't kiss the babies,” reads the caption. “I know they are delicious, and you can’t help but want to, but please refrain. You may cause serious harm to their little bodies.
How, why, and is the warning a bit over the top? Pediatricians explain that NurseLuLu has a point and even give us other ways to express your love for the sweet little baby in your life.
Labor and Delivery Nurse Asks People To Keep Their Mouths Away From Babies
LuLu dug deeper into why she recommends setting firm newborn boundaries when it comes to people kissing your baby in a video with over 13K likes.
“Something that drives me absolutely nuts as a labor and delivery nurse is when I see the family come in and kiss the newborn babies,” she says. “Please don’t do it.”
She then basically describes a scene from a comic strip, ultimately telling the would-be baby-kisser to “put those lethal lips away.” She’s making a joke—sort of—but the message behind the stark warning isn’t a laughing matter.
“I don’t think a lot of people realize that (kissing) can cause a lot of harm to a baby,” she says. “It can kill a baby. It can kill your relationship with their parents if you cannot keep your mouth off their baby.”
That may sound harsh, especially given that the desire to kiss a baby is a well-meaning one, but pediatricians say the TikTok RN is not wrong.
“[Kissing a baby] is a great way to pass on viruses and bacteria,” says Dr. Posner. “It can also transfer herpes, which can be deadly.”
So, if people start eye-rolling a new parent’s no-kissing rule, LuLu says she’s with the parent. So are the many commenters who agree with the video's message—especially if they were once in their shoes.
“The pediatrician kissed my baby at his two-week check-up,” writes one commenter.
“My neighbor kissed my newborn. I never spoke to her again,” says another, who perhaps might have some worthwhile advice to share with the above commenter about their pediatrician.
Others chose to keep “lethal lips” out of sight and out of mind by establishing a no-visitor rule in the hospital or during the newborn's first month of life.
Other commenters included their more sneaky and hilarious tactics.
“I gave everyone the wrong induction date and went in when no one knew,” one commenter wrote.
While the TikTok's comments were mostly positive, I recently watched a generally tame online parenting group (they exist, I promise) implode over the idea that no-kissing rules were simply a way for new parents to go on a power trip, especially with in-laws they dislike.
Respectfully, I disagree. If you want to let people kiss your baby, have at it, but the desire to keep lips off a newborn is often about health and safety. Others may also want to wait until a child consents to kissing. These reasons are valid, and parents shouldn't need to explain themselves to anyone.
The Potential Risks of Kissing Babies
Rachel Prete, DO, a pediatrician with Orlando Health, has also been in a new parent’s shoes.
“As a pediatrician and a mother of two, I always educate my new parents on the dangers of allowing siblings to ‘kiss’ their newborn sibling,” says Dr. Prete. “Although it may be a very cute picture to capture, toddler- and school-aged children quite commonly are exposed to multiple infections and can easily pass that infection to their newborn.”
More broadly, people of all ages can become exposed to or carry infections, and they may feel fine for about 48 hours before showing symptoms. The problem? They may have been contagious that whole time.
“Newborns, especially those under eight weeks of age, are at especially high risk for more severe symptoms from viruses and bacteria,” says Dr. Prete. “While a virus may cause simple cold-like symptoms in an adult, that same virus can cause severe respiratory distress, and even meningitis, in newborns.”
Dr. Prete echoes Dr. Posner’s sentiments above about the herpes virus, which can be spread through simple contact and, in severe cases, can lead to brain damage or death. In fact, infant deaths from herpes rose from 33 in 1995 to 68 deaths in 2019.
Dr. Prete cautions people with a history of cold sores and blisters to take extra caution before kissing an infant, even their own.
Many parents eagerly await their child’s two-month shots and feel safer venturing out or mingling after the little one receives these protections. Even still, it is best to keep lips away from the baby says Alexis Monique Javier, DO, a pediatrician at Children’s Memorial Hermann Pediatrics.
Dr. Javier says the newborn vaccines usually consist of protection against:
- Hepatitis B
- Diphtheria
- Tetanus
- Pertussis
- Haemophilus influenza type b
- Polio
- Rotavirus
- Certain pneumococcal or pneumonia strains
“There are a number of viruses and bacteria that are not preventable with the eight-week shots alone, such as herpes simplex virus or cold sores, (respiratory syncytial virus), and hand-foot-mouth disease, which is most commonly caused by the coxsackievirus,” says Dr. Javier.
Additionally, the eight-week shots only represent the first of several to provide the child with the best protection.
“A benefit of immunizations is not to shield you from a disease entirely but to prevent a baby from getting severe complications such as ending up in the hospital or passing away from these diseases,” says Dr. Javier.
Keep Calm and Snuggle That Baby Instead
In short, one of the best ways to show a newborn baby and their doting new parents you love them is to avoid kissing them.
Some other ways? Let’s start by keeping them safe through layers of precautions.
“Ensure that the people in close contact with the baby are up-to-date on their vaccines, especially the Tdap, flu, and COVID vaccines,” says Dr. Javier. “Also, if anyone is sick or feeling ill, they should not be near the baby to decrease the risk of the baby getting sick as well.”
But not to worry, no kisses doesn't mean that there's no safe way to express your love. Dr. Posner says holding and snuggling are great ways to bond with your baby. Like LuLu says in her TikTok, “These babies don’t need to be kissed by you to know that they are loved." There are plenty of other, safer, methods.
